The Bookstore

Season 9, Episode 17 — 65 scenes

• "-You hanging out? -Yeah, yeah."
• "I'd like to see you come up here and say that to my face."
• "I don't get it. Am I right, people?"
• "I don't believe this."
• "First it was the health club, then the supermarket, now the bookstore."
• "Boy, look at this. Hong Kong's outlawed the rickshaw."
• "She's at that annual Peterman party tonight."
• "Well, that ought to keep you busy for a couple of days, huh?"
• "So, Elaine, are you gonna dance this year?"
• "so they can be brought out of the kitchen."
• "As the woolly-haired Melanesians of Papua New Guinea once said:"
• "No? All right, I'll just have to get things started."
• "Hi. I'm miserable."
• "Excuse me, sir. What are you doing?"
• "Yeah, I understand Gutenberg used to spend a fair amount of time in there."
• "I'm gonna go back there and return it when there's different people working."
• "We made out at the table like our plane was going down."
• "Do you know how embarrassing this is to someone in my position?"
• "As opposed to a spirited bout of skanko Roman wrestling."
• "Well, Newman, he knows a guy in the Hong Kong post office."
• "It's the romance of the handsome cab without the guilt..."
• "Now, that's the first sensible idea I've heard all day."
• "I still have the ringing in the ears. Sounds like the phone."
• "I'm an old man. I'm confused. I thought I paid for it."
• "...between you and me and anyone else you wanna tell."
• "-Isn't that Zach? -Yeah."
• "...or what happened to your homes, but you will have to be physically fit."
• "You're also gonna need a well-toned upper body..."
• "All right, who's first?"
• "Pace yourself. You're gonna have to do this all day for very little money."
• "I'll take the job. Potato salad."
• "Well, you just lost a lot of business because I love to read."
• "If you could just kind of put a scare into him. Set him straight."
• "I'm gonna have to ask you to stand out of the way..."
• "-I'm an old man. I'm confused. -You're under arrest."
• "Besides, it's not stealing if it's something you need."
• "Well, you know, 85 percent of all homeless-rickshaw businesses fail..."
• "So even though you're not really going out with this guy, he's..."
• "Now, I stand up for myself by telling everybody I'm dumping his sorry ass..."
• "-Hey, that's your Uncle Leo. -Uncle Leo. Hello."
• "You know, I could let it go for say a hundred and twenty-five."
• "That book has been on a wild ride. George took into the bathroom..."
• "Oh, yes, I know all about his little performance in the break room."
• "...filled his head with pseudo-erotic tales of my own opium excursions."
• "...the fact is, is that I was planning on breaking up with Zach anyway."
• "-Oh, what, you know, I had planned-- -No buts, Elaine..."
• "...the first 24 hours are the worst."
• "If anyone betrays me, I never forget it."
• "Answer the damn phone."
• "My fake boyfriend is going through real withdrawals."
• "There you go, that's it. Okay, you know what? I gotta go."
• "I just heard a postman spotted a rickshaw down in Battery Park."
• "Goodnight, Newman."
• "Oh, there you are. Oh, do I get the job?"
• "...it's kind of silly for us both to pull this thing all the way back up town."
• "-What's the value of the book? -About $200 Miss DeMooney."
• "You get your toilet book out of here and I won't jump over this counter..."
• "-I could take it in merchandise. -Here I come."
• "So this book will tell me how to get puke out of cashmere?"
• "Yeah. I even got an idea out of it. The detox poncho."
• "Well, don't tarry, I'm behind schedule as it is."
• "Well, this is the first day of the rest of my life."
• "You defile one book, steal another, ask for your money back..."
• "Oh, come on. He's just a lonely old man. All old people steal."
• "...I have to make an example of someone."