The Clip Show

Season 9, Episode 21 — 119 scenes

• "To see this movie we gotta get moving."
• "It seems like every week a whole new set of problems..."
• "Over the last nine years, we've had a lot of experiences."
• "Do you ever get the feeling like you had a haircut, but you didn't have one?"
• "-What in God's name are we doing? -What?"
• "I'm sorry, I thought this was the baby's room."
• "I gave it up for a while, but it was too tough."
• "I'm addicted. They got a hold on me."
• "I can sense the slightest human suffering."
• "-No. -Do you have any prospects?"
• "You got anything on the horizon?"
• "Do you have any conceivable reason for even getting up in the morning?"
• "Every group has someone that they all make fun of."
• "And here's what I'm doing with it!"
• "Hey, hey, hey. All right. Hey, hey. Come on. Stop it."
• "Fall ass-backwards into money. Mooch food off your neighbors..."
• "Well, looks like you've adjusted to the boxers."
• "Don't you see what's going on here?"
• "The only thing between him and us is a thin layer of gabardine."
• "A facecloth for your--"
• "Next thing, you're saying they should have their own schools."
• "I think I'm pretty much like you."
• "-...to TMI long distance service? -Oh, gee, I can't talk right now."
• "I guess you don't want people calling you at home."
• "I'm on no sleep. No sleep! You don't know what it's like in there."
• "Kill me now. I'm begging you."
• "Well, what, kind of like this?"
• "Elaine. What are you doing here?"
• "Have you been to the motor vehicle bureau? It's a leper colony there."
• "Then how are all these people getting together?"
• "...when your name rhymes with a part of the female anatomy?"
• "All right, let's go. I'll give you half an hour."
• "We have to have sex to save the friendship."
• "-Wait a second, what are you doing? -I'm taking your clothes."
• "-Bye, George. -Wait, you can't just leave me here."
• "Elaine, he's a psychiatrist. They're interested in stuff like that."
• "It's getting a little passionate and she starts with the dirty talking."
• "What are you doing?"
• "-So you think you're spongeworthy? -Yes, I think I'm spongeworthy."
• "-Do something about your sideburns? -Yeah, I told you. I'm gonna."
• "Everybody else gets to say it. Why can't I say it?"
• "...see, the thing is..."
• "I'm not married. I'm not allowed to go out with somebody else?"
• "She got anything in your medicine cabinet?"
• "I mean, what are you thinking about, Jerry? Marriage? Family?"
• "And you can forget about watching TV while you're eating."
• ""Well, what kind of day was it?" "Well, I don't know, how about you?""
• "-Okay, fine. Break up with me. -All right. We're broken up."
• "Listen to this. Marcy comes over and she tells me..."
• "I had the lobster bisque. We went back to my place."
• "We just don't think you're ready for a serious relationship."
• "You didn't have make-up sex? How could you not have make-up sex?"
• "With devils and those caves, and the ragged clothing."
• "And if you think I'm going to hell, you should care that I'm going to hell."
• "Movie George. Coffee shop George. Liar George. Bawdy George."
• "No. No thanks, I'm just not hungry."
• "She's got everything I've always wanted in another human being."
• "-She's one of these low talkers. -He's a high talker."
• "-She's too tan. -She's too good."
• "How can I move back in with those people? Tell me."
• "You're not a divorcée. You're just separated."
• "You can't be, because I am out there. And if I see you out there..."
• "-We'll talk about it another time. -But you see my point?"
• "That's perverse."
• "If you know the name of the movie you'd like to see, press one."
• "If this is correct, press one."
• "Why don't you just tell me the name of the movie you selected?"
• "She could come to the party tomorrow and read Gwen's lips for me."
• "...that you hire out for weddings and bar mitzvahs."
• "-If she says no, case closed. -All right."
• "-What is that? Is that lima bean? -Yes."
• "You know what? Has anyone ever told you...."
• "Very good. Very good. You know something?"
• "Well, I'm sorry. There's just no way that we could keep you on."
• "They should call it "Roundtine.""
• "Well, you ladies look lovely tonight."
• "And I need it bad. I feel like I've got bugs crawling up my skin."
• "...for more than 10 seconds, you should hang onto her like grim death."
• "-Five thousand. -Five thousand. Even better."
• "What do you think, I've never ridden in a Cadillac before?"
• "You put the balm on? Who told you to put the balm on?"
• "I'm personally gonna prepare the dinner..."
• "Hey, Cedric, Bob. This guy won't wear a ribbon."
• "Perhaps there's more to Newman than meets the eye."
• "All right, you go ahead. You go ahead, you keep it secret."
• "Oh, the humanity!"
• "...until a person like you comes along and articulates it so perfectly."
• "-Live. -Oh, right, right, right, right, right."
• "No. No. No. No. No."
• "All right. All right. All right!"
• "-Newman. -Jambalaya."
• "I can't sleep, I can't leave the house. I'm climbing the walls."
• "He took it out."
• "What are you doing to yourself?"
• "Every time you shave it, it's gonna come in thicker and fuller and darker."
• "-That's exactly what it is! -Why couldn't you wait?"
• "Could we just drop all the pee-pipe stuff here?"
• "Hey, how's everything? You need anything?"
• "We can't breathe back here."
• "So we're gonna make the post office pay for my new stereo now?"
• "I like sports. I could do something in sports."
• "You know, like the general manager of a baseball team."
• "You know how I always make those interesting comments during the game."
• "The kissing thing is over. There's no more kissing."
• "Kramer, what the hell is going--?"
• "-Are you in? -What, are you kidding?"
• "Oh, man, you're killing me."
• "Julia's still laughing."
• "-No. She's laughing. Right now. -Yes. Yes. We can go."
• "What are you doing here?"
• "In all of Del-- Del-- Del Vista-- Del-- Del Boca Visto?"
• "It looks like an old catcher's mitt."
• "What did you expect?"
• "-What? -Your teeth are all brown."
• "My George isn't clever enough to hatch a scheme like this."
• "That means whatever the hell you want it to mean."
• "You saying you want a piece of me?"
• "You saying you want a piece of me?"
• "You want a piece of me?"