The Airport
Season 4, Episode 12 — 66 scenes
- "Everything on planes is tiny. Tiny food, tiny liquor bottles, tiny pillows..."
- "There'll be a man in a tight suit. He'll tell you you have little time..."
- "-You're wearing that heavy jacket. -Fine, I'll take it off. Grab the wheel."
- "Them giving me an extra ticket. You get a trip to St. Louis. I did my gig."
- "...so I bet him 50 bucks that he couldn't touch the awning."
- "So I told him if he picks us up at the airport, he wouldn't have to pay me."
- "-You're giving him $10? -Well, we got three bags."
- "-Depends on the person and the bag. -How about people like us?"
- "-Five dollars a bag? I don't think so. -Look, you asked, I told you."
- "Because a girl runs like a girl, with the little steps and the arms flailing ..."
- "The price is the same because your flight was canceled."
- "The plane crashes, everybody in first class is gonna die anyway."
- "Yeah, I'm sure you'll live."
- "Oh, you're in here, sir. Welcome aboard."
- "Excuse me, Miss. I think you're sitting in my seat."
- "I never check my bags. Can't stand that waiting in the baggage area."
- "Excuse me. I think you're in my seat."
- "What made you think you could touch that awning?"
- "...pick up their bags, and be walking out of the terminal as we roll up."
- "You know what the traffic will be like? This is a suicide mission!"
- "-Yeah. You know how much duty is? -No, I don't know how much duty is."
- "And I say, "I thought this was an ad for shoes.""
- "Good thing they gave you that washcloth to cover yourself up."
- "How does it look on your side?"
- "Is it worth it not to wake this man up to damage a major organ?"
- "Look at you. You run like a girl. Come on. Run like a man. Lift your knees."
- "No, there it is. Right there, 133. And it's canceled."
- "There's supposed to be a blurb about Jerry. I think he mentioned my name."
- "You don't understand. There's a blurb about me in this."
- "You know what I would do to you if I wasn't in these shackles?"
- "They're scheduled to land in half an hour at La Guardia."
- "Excuse me. I've gotta go to the bathroom."
- "Would you move your seat up, please?"
- "Would you care for some slippers?"
- "Why, it's a perfect fit. You must be Cinderella."
- "One month, he asked me to loan him his share of the rent, 240 bucks."
- "I tried to find him. I went to his girlfriend's house, even his family."
- "We must go forward. Not back."
- "...we've been instructed by the tower to reroute and land at JFK."
- "We apologize for any inconvenience."
- "Let's go. Listen to the bell, Grossbard. It tolls for thee."
- "...a poached Dover sole in a delicate white-wine sauce with a hint of saffron."
- "I'm right there. You just passed it. I'm sitting next to that guy."
- "I'm not giving you my card unless you tell me what it's for."
- "I'll get my money, get off the plane, turn your ticket in for a refund."
- "You're returning it anyway, what's the difference?"
- "I'm sorry to make you do this, but I got stuck in the aisle."
- "He asked me. But you were gone so long, I thought you switched seats."
- "-Then why didn't you take it? -I ordered it six weeks ago. I forgot."
- "You see? That enables you to control your fudge distribution..."
- "Look. I did good. I got supersavers. Come on."
- "-Do you know how much this'll cost? -I'll tell you what."
- "-Listen, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. -Okay, okay."
- "-Eighteenth Street? -I don't know what you're talking about."
- "Sorry. I'm sorry."
- "What? Oh, no, nothing for me, thank you. I'm fine."
- "No. Please don't send me back there. I'll do anything. It's so nice up here."
- "You're trying to relax on the plane, and this is what you have to put up with."
- "The problem is that curtain is no security."
- "Come on. Let go of me. I'm telling you, I didn't do anything wrong."
- "Where are they already? I don't see them anywhere."
- "That was the worst flight I've ever been on in my entire life."
- "-You guys ready? -Yeah."
- "That's why they call it "standby." You end up standing there going, "Bye."
- "It was her first day on the job. So they didn't have a uniform for her yet."
- "So why don't you sit down? I'm about to bring her in.""
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