The Conversion

Season 5, Episode 11 — 81 scenes

• "It makes them seem so insecure, doesn't it?"
• "In any difference of opinion, pants always beats no pants."
• "I've never thought about the price."
• "Get the lobster. I beg you to get the lobster."
• "We can't keep seeing each other."
• "The differences in our religion..."
• "Well, we started to talk, and I told him that I jog."
• "Anyone can get into podiatry school."
• "Well, we can't all be dating podiatrists."
• "How'd you get in?"
• "Her parents won't let her get involved with anyone"
• "This was the only woman I never lied to."
• "You know, in the cab on the way over here, I..."
• "You know, it's not like changin' toothpaste."
• "abdicating the throne to marry Mrs. Simpson."
• "George, I was just kidding around."
• "I am<i> really</i> gonna think about this."
• "Have you always been such a good kisser?"
• "I'd be up in my room, practicing my kissing."
• "Wash my hands. They're sticky from the orange."
• "JERRY [THINKING]: <i>"Fungicide"?</i>"
• "I mean, what could she have?"
• "I said I was comin' down with the flu or something,"
• "Well, I trust people not to do that."
• "Why don't you ask that doctor what it is?"
• "How can one even begin to put into words something so, um...?"
• "you find particularly attractive?"
• "That solemn religious look you want in a faith."
• "Well, it's obvious you are sincere in your desire."
• "don't you offer any kind of an express conversion,"
• "Father, there's a man waiting in the chapel."
• "Oh! Uh, yeah. I'm, uh, here to pick up"
• "I'm Sister Roberta."
• "GEORGE: I can't believe how easy it is!"
• "Brother Costanza will be taking the vow of silence."
• "They're friendly people. No, no, no."
• "Jerry, I'm tellin' ya, I have this power."
• "Just wanted to stop by and see how you were feeling."
• "I found a tube of a fungicide in her medicine cabinet."
• "People always leave old things in their medicine cabinets."
• "Could I use your bathroom?"
• "Well, I mean, the question isn't even for me, actually."
• "which I'm sure is very grueling in its own way."
• "Just lookin' for the soap."
• "ESTELLE: I wanna know what you're doing in there!"
• "but I found another toy I thought you might like."
• "All right, the next time you see him, show him this."
• "When are you seein' him again? I don't know."
• "I've got nothing against the foot."
• "Do you think I should call him and apologize?"
• "What, you're cheating on your conversion test?"
• "stir up all these feelings inside of her."
• "You truly must be filled with the spirit of the Lord."
• "Sister Roberta came to see me yesterday--"
• "I just spoke to her innocently for just a few minutes."
• "They would give anything to be possessed by you."
• "three quarts of vinegar... Mm-hmm."
• "JERRY: What is that stench?"
• "Well, what is this thing around your neck?"
• "You know, you're funkifying the whole building!"
• "Is this the group that goes around mutilating squirrels?"
• "You're not performing any rituals in this house!"
• "And stay away from those squirrels!"
• "I hardly slept last night with all the scratching."
• "He's got this weird sort of skin condition."
• "I thought you said "faddah.""
• "I still got time to catch her."
• "Gotta get there."
• "would you please offer the final benediction?"
• "It's a beautiful religion,"
• "Well, it's my fault. I got a little defensive."
• "You get a bunion, where you goin'?"
• "Oh, it's right down here to the left."
• "[THINKING] <i>"Fungicide"?</i>"
• "By the way, you really need to take a bath. You stink."
• "It's really like an ointment museum, isn't it?"
• ""Oh, I see Mr. Perfect needs tough actin' Tinactin."
• "But I just don't feel ready to make a commitment yet."
• "I'm going to stay with some relatives there for a year."
• "Don't ever change."
• "I'd like a doggie bag for this, please."